i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
