Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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