a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
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