So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
