pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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