are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
