those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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