I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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