giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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