Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
