I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
