Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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