Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize