Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
