one two three fourrrrnication!
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
