chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
