You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize