dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize