But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize