I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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