she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize