So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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