nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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