been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize