Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I didn't notice because vodka
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
