Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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