Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
