how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
