normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
