So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
