there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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