Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
