It's just like the Real World with babies
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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