we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
