We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
