i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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