Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
