idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
