what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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