Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize