Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
