I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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