If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
A bitchslap is in order.
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