i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize