Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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