i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
