Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
