We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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