fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
