Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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