I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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